After having failed his exam in "Logistics and Organization" , a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it. Student: "Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?" Professor: "Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor! " Student: "Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an "A" for the exam. " Professor: "Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?" Student: "What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?" Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as agreed. Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question. He immediately answers: "Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife's lover an "A", although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical." by tombaan

In some remote village of India, one masterji is teaching the Mahabharat katha to class 6 students. He is at the krishnajanma' part of it. Masterji: "Kansa heard the akashwani that his sister's 8th child is going to kill him. He was furious. He ordered to put vasudev n devki behind the bars. First son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning... Second one is born n kansa throws him off the mountain peak. Third one is born." Now Ramu, who is smartest of the lot, puts up his hand and asks "Masterji, I have a doubt" (sounding nervous n confused) Masterji: "Ramu bete, whole India does not have doubt in Mahabharata then how come u have one?" Ramu: Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki's 8th child was going to kill him, WHY THE HELL DID HE PUT VASUDEV AND DEVAKI IN THE SAME CELL? Masterji fainted......................... by tombaan

You might be a Malayali.... ...... If you can fit four passengers in the front seat of an Ambassador taxi, while in the back there are eight passengers and two children with their heads stuck out of the window, chances are, you are a Mallu going toattend your cousin's wedding. If you can run, ride a 100 cc motorbike without wearing a helmet, and playfootball, all while wearing a lungi tied halfmast, Malayali status! If your late father left you a part of an old house as your inheritance, and you turned it into a "chaya kada" yes you're a Malayali. If you have more than 5 relatives working in Gulf, Big Time Malayali.. If you have the words "Chinchu Mol + Jinchu Mol" written on the rear window of your Omni car, Yes, You ARE a Malaayli. If you refer to your husband as kettiyon; ithiyan, pillerude appan, guess what? You're a Central Travancore Syrian Christian Malayali. If you have a tamilian parked in front of your house every Sunday, ironing your clothes, chances are a you are a Middle Class Malayali. If you have more than three employee trade unions at your place of work then ask no further, you are indeed a Malayali. If you have voted into power a Chief Minister who has not passed the 4th grade then ask no further, YOU ARE A MALAYALI. If you have at least two relatives working in the US in the health industry , Yes! Malayali! If you religiously buy a lottery ticket every week, then You're in the Malayali Zone! If you describe a woman as "charrakku" Yep! Malayali.! If you constantly refer to banana as "benana" or pizza as "pissa" you're a Malayali.. If you use coconut oil instead of refined vegetable oil and can't figure out why people in your family have congenital heart problems,you might be a Malayali. If you are going out to see a movie at the local theater with your wifey wearing all the gold jewellery gifted to her by her parents, you are a newly married Malayali.. If you and your wife and three children dress up in your Sunday best and go out to have biriyani at Kayikka's on a 100 cc Bajaj mobike, you an upwardly mobile Malayali from Cochin. If your idea of haute cuisine is kappa and meen curry, then, yes, you are a Malayali.. If you have beef puttu for breakfast, beef olathu for lunch, and beef curry with "borotta"for dinner, yeah, definitely Malalyali. If your name Wilson, and your wife's name is Baby, and you name your daughter Wilby, have no doubts at all , you are a standard Malayali. If most of the houses on your block are painted puke yellow, fluorescent green, and bright pink, definitely Malappuram Malayali. If you tie a towel around your head and burst into a raucous rendition of the song "Kuttanadn Punjayile" after having three glasses of toddy, then you are a hardcore Malayali. If you call appetizers served with alcoholic beverages as "touchings" then you are one helluva Malayali. If the local toddy shop owner knows you by your pet name and you call him "Porinju Chetta" then you are true Malayali. If you're sick and your wifey rubs "Bicks" into your nostrils and gives you "kurumulaku rasam" with chakkara, (grandma's recipe) to help relieve your symptoms, Damn!! You're Malayali. IF YOU DON'T NEED ANY EXPLANATIONS FOR ANY OF THE ABOVE, YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE THE REAL McCOY, A BLUE BLOOD MALAYALI. All meant in fun, don't get all "SIMBLY AGITATED". Pass it on so another Malayali can laff too. by email forward